Are 5,001 Facebook Friends One Too Many?
By AIMEE LEE BALL
Published: May 28, 2010, The New York Times
THE British anthropologist and Oxford professor Robin Dunbar has posed a theory that the number of individuals with whom a stable interpersonal relationship can be maintained (read: friends) is limited by the size of the human brain, specifically the neocortex. “Dunbar’s number,” as this hypothesis has become known, is 150.
Facebook begs to differ.
Friending “sustains an illusion of closeness in a complex world of continuous partial attention,” said Roger Fransecky, a clinical psychologist and executive coach in New York (2,894 friends).
Do you agree or disagree?
Or, do you have a front porch? (local conversation, people you really know or see?)
Alrighty, I guess I'm kicking this sucker off.
ReplyDeleteI can't really vouch for the accuracy or inaccuracy of professor Dunbar's theory. I also can't determine whether it's a theory or merely a hypothesis, because I haven't seen any evidence for it.
If it's just a hypothesis, I think Dunbar is full of crap. The phrase "a stable interpersonal relationship" is intentionally vague, so the premise itself is a bit flawed.
Can you have a real friendship with 5,000 people? Of course not. But I doubt that there's a hard, universal cap on the number that you can have.
I don't entirely disagree with Dunbar's hypothesis. Surely your brain has a limit even when it comes to a number of friends (although i am not sure about an absolute number). But I do disagree with comparing this to Facebook's definition of a friend. I believe that a Facebook friend is more like someone in a list of contacts. You have them listed so you won't forget them, and maybe now and then you'll check on them. But is this a real friendship? No.
ReplyDeleteI think that Facebook friends are basically a group of potential real friends. If you meet someone and think that they could be your friend at some point in the future, you friend request them. Therefore, if your current group of good friends moves in a different direction than where you want to go (or physically moves away), it is relatively easy to start making new close friendships simply by paying more attention to some of your other Facebook friends. So, I agree that there is a limit to how many close friends one can have at one time (not because of mental capacity but because of time constraints), but I think Facebook allows for one to "switch these friends out" for one another relatively easily.
ReplyDeleteThere is no way for a person to have 5,000 real friends. However, I do not believe that a set maximum of friends can be established. Facebook offers a way to stay connected to everyone you have met. For college students, Facebook has their high school friends and their college friends. I believe Facebook connects acquaintances, current friends, and past friends. I agree with Fransecky that Facebook helps us feel more connected with people.
ReplyDeleteFriending a person on Facebook does not necessarily mean you are friends with them. Many people who are friends on Facebook have never met and simply just know of each other. Although I do not believe there a limit to how many Facebook friends you should have, I do believe that friendships on Facebook are somewhat shallow based on the lack of personal contact. I believe that true friends are made away from Facebook; however, I would have to agree with Fransecky's statement. There is a comfort that people feel when they become friends with someone on Facebook.
ReplyDeleteI would agree that there is probably some sort of limit on how many friends a person's brain can handle. I think a lot of the disagreement here stems from the definition of a friend. Professor Robert Dunbar defined friend as a person one has a stable interpersonal relationship with, but that isn't what we define friend as on facebook. There, friend is more like contact than one with whom a person has a close interpersonal relationship.
ReplyDeleteI have to agree with Professor Dunbar that there probably is a limit on how many friends a person can have. But I disagree on the fact that he set a concrete number for a person's number of friends. However, a person's interpretation of the word "friend," reflects how large or small that friendship limit is. I believe Fransecky's "illusion of closeness in a complex world" is the best way to describe friending on facebook. Some people that are your friends on facebook haven't even met you before. But when a person sends a friend request to you on facebook (whether you know the person of not), you do get a false sense of closeness because this person has already tried to make a connection with you.
ReplyDeleteI would have to agree with Professor Dunbar that there is a limit on the number of interpersonal relationships a person can have. Close relationships are not easily made and are hard to maintain. However, Facebook friendships have nothing to do with interpersonal relationships. Facebook is a way to keep up with acquaintances and people you might have just met. When people look at Facebook friendships as real friendships, Fransecky's point becomes valid.
ReplyDeleteI think Professor Dunbar is right to believe that a human can only have a limited amount of true friends. A very small portion of the people you meet and become accquainted with will make a large impact on your life, which I believe constitutes a real friend. Facebook is just an avenue for meeting and staying in touch with people whom you may or may not consider a friend. The idea that "friending" connotes a closer bond than may really exist can honestly go both ways. You may talk to someone a bunch on the internet and never build much a relationship with said person, or you may meet someone who you enjoy being around and develop a real friendship by spending time with that person, not online.
ReplyDeleteAll Facebook allows us to do is keep tabs on our friends. We can see what they're doing and who they're hanging out with. This results in very superficial relationships. So I'd have to agree with Fransecky. I'm not sure about the number of 150, but that even seems a little high to me. Half of the friends we have on facebook, we've met maybe once. Anyone who calls that a friend is sadly mistaken. True friendship is still out there, and it's found the old-fashioned way. Facebook, despite how much it has tried, still hasn't changed the meaning of true relationships.
ReplyDeleteI would agree that there is a number of true friends someone can have, but i do not think that there is a formal to find this number and it is different for everyone. When it comes to facebook, "friends" are a way to keep connections. It allows you to discover information (what the homework you missed was, where to meet for a party, etc.) easier than before. The more "friends" you have the more easily information can be spread through large numbers of people. I also think that these connections will allow people to more successful in life because of networking.
ReplyDeleteI agree that Facebook maintains an illusion of connection. In fact, I think that it makes us less wanting to form connections with people physically around us. While making "friends" on Facebook, we can still maintain some anonymity. I also agree that there is a limit to how many true friends one can have. It may not depend on a specific region of the brain, but more on the ability of the individual to be spread out over such a wide array of personality.
ReplyDeleteFirstly, the number 150 as being the number of friends the human brain can support is just odd. I believe it is hard enough to maintain one true interpersonal relationship. I think that this is part of the issue with Facebook. While it is a great way to connect with people and business partners, I agree with Lance that is maintains an illusion of connection. Honestly, I have a tough time accepting Dunbar's theory.
ReplyDeleteI think Facebook is an organizational tool for social information. Camille, Lance, and several others all make points I agree with -- Facebook isn't as personal as a phone, but it allows us to keep connections. More broadly, it helps us organize our social capital -- relationships with people -- that may benefit our selves or our relationships with still other people. And yet Facebook is also very close to our hearts, a catalog of the things we like.
ReplyDeleteAnyway, I suppose I agree with Kevin; Facebook friends are potential friends. The "illusion of closeness" comes from the memory of pleasant acquaintances, and is a lubricant for further interaction.
I would agree with the claim that there a certain number of personal friends a person can have. However, I wouldn't say that number is the same for every person. There is a limit only because there is not enough time to make all friends so personal. with little time to deal with, we only make a small amount of really close friends and those are the ones that spend that small amount of time with us. Therefore I believe that time is more of a factor than our brains are.
ReplyDeleteI think that Prof. Dunbar's argument has some merit, although making an "absolute max" limit of friends seems like an oversimplification of things. It is definitely true, however, that you can only have so many friends, and even less truly good friends. Since building a strong friendship takes time and effort and if you spread yourself too thin it is readily obvious because you can't even remember the names of all your friends. Facebook is definitely a good way to stay in touch with friends, but it alone wont actually make get you friends.
ReplyDelete